Student Quotes of the Day, Part 1

I've been collecting these over the last couple of months in a document on my desktop. Many of them you've probably seen if you're on my G-chat. But for those of you who haven't had the pleasure of enjoying them, here is a list of my favorite student quotes.

Tina: "Teacher, you look delicious."

Lisa: “Teacher, you look like a Stepford wife.”

Dennis (9th grader): "I want to see your boyfriend."
Meredith: "I don’t think he wants to see you..."
Dennis: "Man, you are both whack!"

Lillian: “These math jokes are lame.”

Dennis: [referring to his Life Skills teacher] "I’m gonna kill her."

Me: No you aren’t.

Dennis: Well, then I’m going to egg her car.

Me: And what would that accomplish?

Dennis: Pleasure.

*note: the above mentioned teacher was later fired for possession of illegal drugs.

Dennis was able to bring his grade up from a D to an A*

Richard: "Teacher, you should get married and have a baby so you don’t have to work here anymore."

Denny: [regarding Matt (Kleinhans) Teacher]: "He looks like a young version of Mr. Rodgers."

*Korean's don't generally know how to rock the sweater vest*

Lisa: [to Roz, regarding the reason she now has difficulty in school] "You are the reason I am this way!!"

*brilliant blame-shifting logic*

Phonetic spelling of "Brad Pitt" with a Korean accent: “Bread Pete” – Robby

In English class...

Dennis: [insults Richard, then, laughing] "I’m sorry."

Meredith: "You aren’t really sorry."

Dennis: "Yes I am…see I’m crying…"

Laura Teacher: "I think you just violated one of Ben Franklin’s virtues."

Sean, in dealing with the stress of writing a thesis statement: "I'm feeling light-headed."

Dennis: [discussing how he wanted to go to Matt Teacher’s wedding last year] “If you get married Teacher—whooo—I’m gonna stalk you!!”

Denny: "I miss being on top."

*meaning, he misses being an 8th grader, rather than lowly 9th...*

Matt: "When I got my AP test and saw that it was a 5--I just dropped it on the floor and was like - I. Am. A historian. Books should be written about me."

*humility + 1*

Dennis: [referring to dealing with acne] "My mom made me an appointment with a pediatrician and they took care of it."

Dennis: [to Sonia] "I thought I was dreaming when I saw Meredith." [to me] "...because you're so beautiful."

Day in the Life

In case you've been curious why I don't post anymore, we are in week four of the summer program here at Prep Center, and it turns out that having a regular nine-to-six type job actually has made me more busy than before, leaving little time for writing anything other than G-chat status updates. But for your reading pleasure, here are a few random tidbits to give you a feel for what my day looks like above and beyond the generic duties of keeping track of students, teachers, and curriculum.

Things I Googled Today:

1. Smashing Pumpkins

2. Definition of a Participle

3. The distance between 644 Landfair and my house (1.9 miles)

4. Counseling jobs in Los Angeles

5. SAT testing policies

6. TAP passes for the Metro

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Things I Taught Someone Today:

1. How to make egg drop soup - more specifically, how to drop said egg into the soup.

2. Why the word "tempted" is not past tense and therefore appropriate for a literary essay (see also above, number 2).

3. How to prioritize tasks when you have missing assignments that are over a week late in all of your classes.

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Geek Out!!

Find the errors in the following example sentences for vocabulary words in The Princeton Review's 2006 edition of Cracking the New SAT:

"Many Jews left Russia and emigrated to Israel after it was founded in 1948."

"Lou's taste in music is eclectic because he listens to everything from rap to polka."

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Regarding My Lunch (Half) Hour:

Number of Tuesdays in a row that I've had Chinese food for lunch: 4

Estimated number of Orange Chicken lunch specials I have ordered from China Wok: 27

Best fortune cookie prediction: "Alas! The onion you are eating is someone else's water lily."

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Teacher Quote of the Day:

"I love your outfit today. You look like Minnie Mouse. In a good way."

***

Current project I'm working on: finding fun, non-touristy stuff to do in the San Francisco area for our college tour coming up in August.

Current project my assistant is working on: typing sets of 100 SAT vocabulary words and making corresponding quizzes.

Current project my boss is working on: creating a motivational seminar for incoming 8th and 9th graders based on The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People.