Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Student Quotes of the Day, Part 2

The 2nd and final (see following post) set of quotes from my students...

Brian: "Dude...I'm so buff, my elbows don't touch."


Denny: “It’s like my head it stuck between a rock and a hard place. Except it’s just two rocks.


Denny: “Why do you carry a Bible around? I mean I would understand if it was Harry Potter…”


Denny: [discussing his theory on making good grades] "The difference between an A and a B is a present."


[discussing wedding registries]

Me: “I got Santiago dominoes because it’s something you can invite people over to play.”

Denny: “Dominoes? Who plays dominoes? I’d just play cards.”

Me: “Well then when you get married I’ll buy you a stack of cards.”

Denny: [offended, indignant] “Cards? Geez…I’d buy you an expensive bottle of wine!”


Lillian: [to Matt]: “Teacher, I don’t get you sometimes.”


Sonia Teacher: “Oh Denny, I’m only joking…”

Denny: “Well you aren’t funny. If you’re going to tell a joke, it should at least be funny.”


Denny: “Those librarians are sneaky!”


Meredith Teacher assigns fierce homework load involving a Roald Dahl story…

Shawn: “Aww….teacher I hate you…”

Meredith: “I’m ok with that.” [Walks out.]


Esther: “I am an athlete-student. And not the other way around.”


ESL student: “I don’t like Fall too because it’s gets cold and there are a lot of rain and my mom and I promised that I will do all the dishes for one week in the Fall and that’s why I don’t like…Fall.”


Sonia Teacher: “Viscous – do you know what that means?”

Esther: “Strait.”

Sonia: “No”

Esther: “Not kinky?”

Sonia: “Uh…no…”

Esther: “It sounds like it would be something dangerous. Like vicious.”


Matt Teacher: “[Meredith Teacher] already has a man. And he’s quite a man. The word ‘hunk’ comes to mind.”

...this involved me blushing and leaving the room.


Denny: “Oh gosh! I don’t want to watch white people dance!”


John: “When I was putting the sugar in my tea I fell asleep again and my hand fell in my tea and stayed there for a while…”


Sean: “I feel your pain. Actually, no I don’t. I’m just saying it ‘cause it sounds cool.”


Shawn: Are you a couple?

Meredith: Do you mean…am I in a couple? Or part of a couple…?

Shawn: Right.

Meredith: Yes.

Shawn: Aww – you have a boyfriend! That’s cute. What does he look like?

Julie: “I saw him! He’s tall.”

Shawn: “Is he ripped?”

Edward: “Is he white?”

Julie: “…and he’s blonde.”

Sean: “Does he have a tattoo of your face on his shoulder?!?”

...um, no. Thankfully.


Dennis: [learning that I’m leaving in a week] “We should start a boycott! …Or have a party. Your choice.”


Sean: [handing me a bar of soap] “Matt Teacher told me to give you this and tell you that I don’t know why it was in my pocket and it’s distracting the class.”


Esther: [regarding my leaving] “This is horrible. I’m gonna go home and freaking weep!”


Esther: “You don’t need one man. You could have a team!”

...that was a fun one to respond to.


Eunice: “Are you really leaving?”

Me: “Yes…weird huh?”

Eunice: “Why?”

- I explain -

Eunice: [not satisfied] “Teacher…is it really because you’re getting married…?”

...she wasn't the only one who thought that the only reason I could possibly leave Prep

was if I were getting married.

No comments: