Let me know if you find the key.

I apologize for my absence lately, but I haven't found much that I wanted to write about. Actually there are plenty of things going through my head right now, but none of them seem blog-worthy. I promised myself when I started this blog that it would never turn into a secret diary from whence I could refer to people (that happen to be my readers) in hopes that they get the secret encoded message and respond in the way I would like.

The same principle applies to myspace profile songs--I mean--what do those things mean anyway? If they are an expression of how you feel currently or about life, then WHAT IN THE WORLD do they really mean? It's the inherent problem of poetry: it rarely means what it sounds like on the surface, which is both the draw and the frustration of the beast. Not to throw anyone under the bus, but what am I supposed to assume when I hear lyrics like, "Everybody know that I believe if you spell it out for me. Spell it out so everyone can see. All that really matters now to me is I could set you free." Besides the fact that I'm not sure I quite understand the song itself completely, I catch myself over analyzing: who is said friend hoping will hear and respond to the song? And what should is that person supposed to be spelling out? And what about my other friend with her Amy Winehouse song: "I cried for you on the kitchen floor. I cheated myself like I knew I would. I don't ya I was trouble. You know that I'm no good..." What makes certain music resonate with us? I'll be the first to admit that my favorite stuff is usually pretty emo (I was raised on country, what do you expect?), and I'm often guilty of encoding messages in everything I say. Perhaps I'm doing it right now--trying to avoid expressing myself by talking about how difficult it is to express ones self. (tricky huh?) So I'll go ahead and claim hypocrisy when I say that I think you should stop doing this--the whole game of saying things covertly. I understand that having a filter is important, but I forget what is withheld for wisdom's sake and what I'm just afraid to say.